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Step Off the Anxiety Carousel
00:02:38 It’s called ACT: Action Commitment Therapy.
00:05:48 Contacting the Present
00:08:15 Cognitive Defusion
00:10:19 Acceptance
00:12:25 The Observing Self
00:16:30 Take Committed Action
00:20:01 Summary
The Overthinking Cure: How to Stay in the Present, Shake Negativity, and Stop Your Stress and Anxiety (Mental and Emotional Abundance Book 3) By: Nick Trenton
Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/OverthinkingCureTrenton
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09JMNMD71
Are you ready to break free from overthinking and find inner peace? In this episode, we dive into the powerful insights from Nick Trenton's latest book, "The Overthinking Cure." Discover practical strategies to silence negative self-talk and embrace the present moment. From cognitive defusion to committed action, learn how to take control of your mindset and unlock a brighter future. Say goodbye to stress and anxiety, and hello to a life of emotional abundance!
Don't let your mind hold you back. Hear the cure and start living a happier life today! Check out the book at https://bit.ly/OverthinkingCureTrenton
Are you ready to break free from the cycle of overthinking and anxiety? In this episode, we dive into Chapter 2 of "The Overthinking Cure" by Nick Trenton. Discover your super weapon against anxiety and learn how to step off the never-ending carousel of negative thoughts.
Nick provides powerful techniques such as 'Going Meta' and 'Cognitive Defusion' that will help you contact the present moment and accept your emotions without judgment. By embracing an observing self, you'll gain control over your internal dialogue and take committed action towards a happier life.
Transcript
Hello listeners, welcome to The Path to Calm.
Speaker:Stop overthinking, become present, find peace on this beautiful May 13th, 2025.
Speaker:Today's featured book is The Overthinking Cure, How to Stay in the Present, Shake Negativity, and Stop Your Stress and Anxiety by Nick Trenton.
Speaker:In this book, Trenton uses proven techniques to teach you how to regain control over your racing thoughts.
Speaker:The overthinking cure offers hope and practical steps.
Speaker:It's a game changer for many.
Speaker:Today's episode specifically pulls chapter 2 from this book, Step Off the Anxiety Carousel.
Speaker:Our focus will be on the ACT model, which provides an innovative approach to managing our thoughts and taking control of our well-being.
Speaker:We'll uncover the secrets behind action-commitment therapy and how it can help us navigate through those overwhelming moments of anxiety.
Speaker:We'll learn about the six core principles that form the foundation of ACT, each offering a unique perspective on accepting our internal and external experiences and committing to meaningful action.
Speaker:So join us as we explore the fascinating world of ACT and discover how the model can empower us to take control, accept what is, and create a life filled with purpose and peace.
Speaker:It's time to untangle ourselves from overthinking and find freedom in mindful action.
Speaker:Let's get started.
Speaker:In the last chapter, we saw how the creation of distance allows you to try on different, potential better perspectives and witness your own physiological, mental, and psychological processes as an observer, rather than as an unconscious participant tangled up in it all.
Speaker:This kind of detachment may have reminded you of another popular approach to mental health issues of all kinds: meditation and mindfulness practice.
Speaker:Can mindfulness help you cultivate a sense of calm in your life?
Speaker:Absolutely.
Speaker:However, “mindfulness” can mean so many things.
Speaker:In this chapter, we’ll explore a mindfulness-based technique especially helpful for managing emotions and bringing a sense of calm control to your life.
Speaker:It’s called ACT: Action Commitment Therapy.
Speaker:The acronym, simply, speaks to the two parts of the approach:
Speaker:23 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,480 • We accept what we cannot control.
Speaker:• We commit to taking action with the things we can in order to better our lives.
Speaker:Both acceptance and commitment to action allow you to proactively manage your thoughts and emotions—your lived experience.
Speaker:They are skills that have mindfulness at their core, and they work in tandem to help you create the life you want, i.e., the life that aligns with the things that matter the most to you and your values.
Speaker:In ACT, mindfulness is about being open, aware, and focused on the present.
Speaker:We approach our work with our “observing self,” i.e., the part of us that is aware of everything that is unfolding in the moment.
Speaker:This is the meta position we spoke about, which allows distance and perspective.
Speaker:Unlike meditation, however, the mindfulness is ACT is more of a set of skills, and something we connect to the concrete world through conscious action.
Speaker:We can use ACT techniques on the spur of the moment throughout our day, or we can practice more deliberately in the longer term with a therapist—or both.
Speaker:They are simple, however, and can be mastered on your own—all you need is to activate your conscious “observing self.” The goal of ACT, however, is not exactly to make you calm; rather, in time you increase your psychological flexibility.
Speaker:This means your observing self is strengthened, and you are better able to stay in the present, and take action according to your values, increasing your quality of life.
Speaker:Problems don’t magically disappear—but you become more resilient, more responsive, and more masterful at how you deal with them.
Speaker:Does having this transcendent, meta, observing self mean you are permanently detached from life and your own emotions?
Speaker:Actually—the opposite!
Speaker:From the ACT perspective, anxiety and unhappiness often come from “experiential avoidance” which is the inner resistance toward unwanted thoughts, feelings, and sensations.
Speaker:Avoiding your experience in the present may work temporarily but fails in the long term and creates psychological suffering.
Speaker:The paradox is that by gaining some distance from strong sensations, thoughts, and emotions in the moment, we are actually able to see them, accept them, and work with them by taking action.
Speaker:In this way, we engage more with life.
Speaker:According to this approach, then, mindfulness is not to stay lofty and removed from experience, but to bring you into healthy and sustainable conscious contact with the present moment and everything you experience in it.
Speaker:In ACT, there are six “core processes” that you can think of as tools in a toolkit to help you manage life and build psychological flexibility.
Speaker:The processes do overlap.
Speaker:Let’s consider each with a real-life example (and it always does come down to real life!).
Speaker:Contacting the Present
Speaker:47 00:05:52,160 --> 00:06:05,160 Sounds serious, but this is simply being aware and conscious in your observing self, rather than mindlessly being carried by sensations, or being trapped inside experience (i.e., reactive).
Speaker:Here we have full, real awareness in the here and now.
Speaker:We are receptive, alive, and alert.
Speaker:In ACT, all you have is the present—the future hasn’t arrived, the past is long gone.
Speaker:All our power to engage with life and make choices rests right here in the present.
Speaker:So that’s where we focus!
Speaker:Even if you’re not into meditation at all, you can gain a lot by practicing grounding techniques that bring you to the present via your senses.
Speaker:Your mind can race around to the future or the past, or frighten itself with hypothetical stories and possibilities.
Speaker:Your body, however, can only ever be in one place: the present.
Speaker:So, when you connect with your body, you necessarily connect with the present.
Speaker:Your body is your anchor—or rather, you have five anchors: sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch.
Speaker:You can practice grounding techniques any time you like, whether it’s to get out of an anxiety spiral or simply as a wellbeing practice akin to exercise or eating your veggies.
Speaker:Try the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, where you pause to sink into five things you can see, then four things you can hear, three you can touch, two you can smell, and one you can taste.
Speaker:The exact details are unimportant.
Speaker:All that matters is that you completely immerse yourself in your present moment using your senses.
Speaker:You automatically take yourself away from anxious rumination, give yourself distance, and become able to see thoughts and feelings for what they are.
Speaker:As an example, imagine the doctor has just diagnosed you with stage 3 cancer.
Speaker:You feel like you’ve been hit by a bus.
Speaker:The first tool you take out the toolkit is to simply become aware that you are having an experience.
Speaker:You might sit down and go into the observing self by noticing your bodily reactions, your initial thoughts, and your feelings.
Speaker:You take a deep breath.
Speaker:You just look at the moment around you and take it in.
Speaker:Cognitive Defusion
Speaker:71 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:23,120 This is where we step back and detach.
Speaker:In ACT, we learn to see our perceptions and thoughts for what they are: images, symbols, bits of information, stories, memories, assumptions.
Speaker:What they are not: absolute reality, laws, or something that has complete control over us.
Speaker:Let’s quickly explore what is meant by cognitive fusion.
Speaker:When we act as though our thoughts are the same as reality, we can say that we are fusing the two.
Speaker:We believe that what we think is precisely the same as what is actually happening, one hundred percent true, and of total importance.
Speaker:Sometimes, in fused thinking, we assume that our thoughts need to be obeyed or that they’re orders.
Speaker:We think that our knee-jerk assumption is wise or all-knowing.
Speaker:The truth is, however, that there is a difference between our symbol of a thing and the thing itself.
Speaker:When we become aware that our thought about a situation and the situation are two different things, we defuse.
Speaker:We realize that we are using language to tell ourselves a story that we then believe unquestioningly.
Speaker:Defusing is not forcefully imagining the world in a way that it isn’t, rather it is us undoing the process of fusing our thoughts with reality.
Speaker:In the same way as the word “apple” is not an apple, our idea of a situation is not the situation.
Speaker:In our example, we could get caught up in extreme anxiety and sadness, and tangled up in hopelessness or despair or anger.
Speaker:But if we contact the present and then go still inside ourselves, we can gain perspective.
Speaker:We can be outside our experiences, rather than tumbled along inside them.
Speaker:This could be as simple as saying, “I’m feeling a lot of confusion right now,” instead of, “What the hell am I going to do?”
Speaker:89 00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:22,440 Acceptance
Speaker:91 00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:28,840 This is not condoning or agreeing with what we find in the present moment.
Speaker:It is simply acknowledging that what is happening is, in fact, happening.
Speaker:We don’t resist it or argue with it or pretend it doesn’t exist.
Speaker:We simply give it room to be what it is.
Speaker:Accepting something doesn’t mean we necessarily like it or understand it, only that we openly and plainly agree that it is our reality.
Speaker:A more helpful term may be “expansion.” We simply make room for what is.
Speaker:Imagine you are simply becoming aware of what is happening, as though you were an alien who had never experienced that thing before, and had no memories, expectations, assumptions, or fears—you just observed what you observed.
Speaker:Some ACT practitioners advice “breathing into” a sensation.
Speaker:Maybe you notice that there’s a tight feeling across your chest.
Speaker:How could you make room for, and breathe into, this sensation?
Speaker:Instead of interpreting it (“you’re stressed”), resisting it (“oh, it’s nothing”), or getting panicked (“is there something wrong with my heart?”), you just make room.
Speaker:You notice the sensation, the temperature, the various feelings and where they occur, and how.
Speaker:You breathe into this awareness, expanding into it.
Speaker:In our example, we might be tempted to think, “Get a grip, you’re being too dramatic about all this,” or, “Chin up,” or even, “Why aren’t you more upset?
Speaker:You must be in denial.
Speaker:You’re not doing this right .
Speaker:.
Speaker:.”
Speaker:110 00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:15,280 Instead, we could simply accept how we are, as we are, without needing to rush along to a conclusion or fix anything or escape uncomfortable sensations.
Speaker:Actually, when you stop struggling against sensations this way, you often allow them to move on, and they have less impact on you, not more.
Speaker:The Observing Self
Speaker:114 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:32,840 There is a part of you that is in the world, experiencing.
Speaker:There is also a part of you that is outside it, unchanging, non-judgmental, aware, unable to be harmed—we call it the observing self.
Speaker:Experience and change wash over us, but there is a part of us that is always there, unaffected.
Speaker:When we are in our observing self, we are detached enough to know that no experience will last forever, control us, or be dangerous to us.
Speaker:Our observing self is curious, open, and interested in life, and never resists or avoids it.
Speaker:This self can see all without being flooded by it.
Speaker:No matter what we experience or how intense, there is always some part of us set aside that is unaffected and able to observe while disidentified.
Speaker:It’s this self that gives us the power of choice.
Speaker:It’s this self that lets us identify our values and choose actions toward those values—regardless of the fleeting experiences we have.
Speaker:Here, it’s important to distinguish between your awareness and your ordinary, mental cognitive processes.
Speaker:Being aware is not the same as simply thinking.
Speaker:In thinking, we generate ideas, delve into memories, engage our beliefs, and so on .
Speaker:.
Speaker:.
Speaker:but when we are aware, we simply observe what the thinking mind creates.
Speaker:In thinking, we might believe, “I’m unhappy, things shouldn’t be as they are,” but in our observing self, we merely note, “This is how things are.” Those who struggle with anxiety can often find mindfulness doesn’t help precisely because they have mistaken everyday rumination for being “aware.”
Speaker:131 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:30,200 In our example, the observing self is able to take a step back from the experiencing self—in effect there are two selves.
Speaker:One is having a shocking, painful experience, the other is observing that shock and that pain.
Speaker:“My head seems to be all over the place right now.
Speaker:My body is suddenly all tense and I feel like I could cry.
Speaker:I’ve had some bad news and am obviously having a strong reaction .
Speaker:.
Speaker:.”
Speaker:139 00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:52,720 Find your values
Speaker:141 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:57,440 Awareness in itself is extremely valuable.
Speaker:But the power of ACT is that we can become aware, and then put that awareness into a bigger context.
Speaker:What actually matters to us?
Speaker:What do we care about most?
Speaker:What kind of people do we want to be?
Speaker:Why are we here on this planet?
Speaker:What are we most prepared to stand for, create, or defend?
Speaker:What brings purpose, joy, and meaning in your life?
Speaker:We say that ACT helps us create a better life, but it’s our own unique personal values that help us decide what that “better” actually looks like.
Speaker:In your heart, you have certain principles and cherished beliefs that help you orient yourself so that you feel you are living with integrity and purpose.
Speaker:Goals are shorter term, and singular.
Speaker:Values, however, speak to our bigger picture direction in life.
Speaker:Sometimes values will be in conflict, or unclear, or even change.
Speaker:That’s okay.
Speaker:You can keep asking, “What are my values right now, right here, with regard to this situation?” If you ask yourself often, you will never wander too far!
Speaker:Returning to our example, with time, we might be able to consciously say to ourselves, “I am a person who has never wanted to be guided or controlled by fear.
Speaker:I’m a brave person and I value courage.
Speaker:No matter happens to me with my health, I know that I can always choose to be strong and dignified, and that itself gives me courage.”
Speaker:160 00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:34,120 Take Committed Action
Speaker:162 00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:42,920 Finally, when your values are clarified, and you are aware of them, you can engage in the final process: committed action.
Speaker:No, this is not just any old action, but valued action.
Speaker:Action without conscious inspiration or purpose is useless at best and harmful at worst.
Speaker:You can act, though, in any moment, if you have enough conscious awareness to be guided by your values.
Speaker:But it’s up to you to give your actions shape and meaning.
Speaker:Perhaps you decide that you’re going to find out as much information about your cancer diagnosis as possible, keeping informed and proactive, and taking responsibility for your own health rather than allowing fear and panic to take over.
Speaker:Perhaps you get down a journal and note some questions to discuss with your doctor, or make a conscious choice about how you’re going to speak to your family about your diagnosis.
Speaker:As you can see, the ACT approach combines awareness and acceptance and uses it to initiate conscious, value-driven action that actually makes your life better.
Speaker:You change your relationship to your inner experience and to life itself.
Speaker:You give yourself more control and reduce the influence that external events have on you.
Speaker:When you cannot change circumstances, the acceptance part allows you to come to terms with it.
Speaker:When you can change your circumstances, you do so from an empowered, aware position, and make sure that your actions reflect what ultimately matters in your life.
Speaker:Think of it as a way to make mindfulness more applicable and practical in everyday life—as well as more personally meaningful.
Speaker:Now, all of the above may seem like a lot to remember!
Speaker:But there is a simple way to bring the ACT approach into your life right now:
Speaker:178 00:18:29,360 --> 00:18:32,240 Remember the ACT acronym.
Speaker:A – Accept your internal experience in the present moment.
Speaker:C – Choose a valued direction
Speaker:182 00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:44,440 T – Take action in that direction
Speaker:184 00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:46,000 For example:
Speaker:186 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,280 A – Accept.
Speaker:Notice that you are feeling sad and excluded by friends who’ve uninvited you from their event.
Speaker:Accept, expand and breathe into these feelings from your observing self, without judgment or avoidance.
Speaker:C – Choose a valued direction; remember that you value kindness and compassion in your relationships.
Speaker:Choose to forgive and forget while being kind to yourself and knowing that you have innate value whether your friends recognize it or not.
Speaker:T – Take action; call up another friend or do something else you enjoy instead rather than dwell on the feelings of rejection.
Speaker:Listeners, when it comes to anxiety, rumination, and overthinking, mindfulness practices can help if they're tethered to concrete action in the moment as outlined in the ACT model.
Speaker:In Action Commitment Therapy, we accept what we cannot control, and we commit to taking action to change the things we can according to our personal values and in order to improve our lives.
Speaker:In ACT, anxiety is often about experiential avoidance, which we can counteract using those six core principles.
Speaker:The first principle is to genuinely contact the present without judgment, interpretation, resistance, or narrative, but with conscious alertness and open curiosity about what is unfolding in the now.
Speaker:The second is cognitive diffusion, where we separate out our thoughts about reality from reality itself.
Speaker:We accept our thoughts as thoughts so we don't get tangled up in them.
Speaker:The third is acceptance, where we welcome and acknowledge reality without arguing with it.
Speaker:We don't have to agree or condone, only observe.
Speaker:We use the fourth concept, the observing self, to have a conscious meta-perspective on our thoughts.
Speaker:One part is having an experience, one part is observing us having that experience.
Speaker:The fifth is to find our values and principles so that we can put our thoughts into context.
Speaker:The observing self can appraise our thoughts and compare them against our values so we can do the sixth principle, take conscious inspired action.
Speaker:The acronym ACT can help us accept our internal experience in the present moment, choose a valued direction, and take action in that direction.
Speaker:This reduces anxiety and overthinking, so remember friends, acceptance, commitment, and taking conscious action are the keys to unlocking a calmer state of mind.
Speaker:As Lao Tzu once said, if you're transformed by what is within you, everything you do will be transformed.
